We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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