im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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