hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
