No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
