Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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