oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
