i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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