You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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