she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Send help, water and tortillas.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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