Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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