every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
