So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
