that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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