ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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