If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
