I am puke
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
