Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
