god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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