My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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