Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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