This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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