Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
