We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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