So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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