Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
