That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
