what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
