found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I need to align my fucking chakras
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize