Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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