hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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