And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Please don't give away my fajitas
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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