we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
