Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
