I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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