No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
