i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize