I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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