Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Randomize
