So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
