He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Randomize
