If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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