It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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