he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
