you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
