the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
