Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
