i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
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