so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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