Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
i believe in u and ur pee
So here I am, sexting at work.
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