Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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