when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
